In the Present
It's been frustrating, not being able to plan ahead. Don and I indulged ourselves, imagining travel possibilities this summer. The thoughts got worrisome. Then we thought ahead to Christmas. Will the kids be able to fly home? We went back to living in the present... watching the birds in our yard and the people walking on a nearby sidewalk...
It's not healthy to "live in the past" all the time, but I've been doing more of it lately.
An ad popped up on Instagram, offering a year subscription to Reminisce magazine. $7. for 7 magazines! I ordered a subscription for my dad and one for me. I figure once we get them, we can talk on the phone and chuckle over some of the spotlighted features.
In the Moment With Dad
Every time I talk to Dad, we start out talk about NOW. He tells me if there are any birds at his bird feeder. He tells me what the headlines say, on his Springfield paper.
I tell him about the progress on our latest puzzle or what sounds I hear in my neighborhood at the moment. He knows, I'm not stuck in one room, but I want him to know I'm restricted like him.we are all restricted.
Food in the Future?
I often ask Dad what he had for lunch. He's never overly enthused, but he often adds, "I can't complain. I don't have to cook and they deliver my meals to my room!"
The other day, when we were talking about food, I dared to ask about the future. "So someday, when we're past all this and you can dine out and have the feast of your choice...?"
I guess that wasn't a good question.
Dad answered me quickly, without any real emotion.
"Oh, I don't think we're ever getting out of this."
And that made me pretty sad. We went back to talking about the past.
I never tire of asking about the plays that I remember Dad directing. Dad likes talking about the past, when he was doing creative, important things. Don't we all.
When I was a kid, I didn't understand or appreciate most of the shows Dad directed. But I'm curious about all of them, now. One play that I don't remember, was the first play he ever directed. He told about the local production of "I Remember Mama". He directed it when he was still in high school.
On Mother's Day, Dad told me the movie version was showing on TCM.
"It's pretty sentimental. he added.
"You mean like, sappy? Or corny? Or good sentimental?" I asked.
"Oh a real tear jerker. It's good." He said.
I love old movies, so I was happy to watch. It was nice to be able to talk about the movie with Dad the next day.
Mostly, the movie made me think back to the past, with memories of my own mom. Thinking back to the past is a lot better than living in the past.
I started this complaining list/blog, in May 2016. I posted 200 gripes about my breast cancer and then I was done.
On March 13, 2020, I started venting all over again, when another disease (starting with a C) interfered with my life. Only this time, it was affecting more than me. I ranted for a year, until I got my vaccine in March 2021.
Coronary Artery Disease was the reason I restarted this blog on September 26, 2021. This time it was Don who was dealing with a worry that started with the letter "C".
Coronavirus and Cancer, Coronary Artery Disease! All are evil, but none can totally get me down... if I vent! I usually end up feeling a little more positive at the end of each post!