#75 - Don't Like Mood Plunges

I was in the best mood with good energy, because the kids are coming for Labor Day.  All 4! Heidi & Jamie and Scott & Chali!  With their crazy school and work schedules and living in Austin and New Orleans, we've only had all 6 of us together  one time, in 2 years.

So I was in good spirits and I was doing too much.  Besides getting the house ready, I was trying to finish my project, reorganizing my workroom.  My sister called when I was taking a break. She laughed, because she knows my technique.  It's a bad one.  I pull it all out. Every closet every drawer.  Teaching supplies and art materials and props that go back over 30 years. Things were flying to trash, recycling and Goodwill piles.  But I was feeling good and my nurse called and said my blood count had shot up.  I was in good shape.

Then my phone rang, again. Actually it wasn't this black phone. That's just one of the many props I tripped over trying to get through the mess to my cell.  I missed the call, but my hairdresser left a text.  "Hi, Beth. Just wanting to know if you needed your hair done. I have an opening next week."

It hit a nerve.  3 months ago, I was sort of frantic when I called G.  "Is there anyway you could squeeze me in tomorrow?" She'd done my hair for 15 years, so I felt comfortable telling her I just found out I was having a surgery and I wasn't sure what was happening after that.  The next day I headed in for my appointment. I hoped G. wouldn't get too emotional. I knew there would be a big hug waiting and some consoling. But when I walked in, she beamed.  "Hey what's up!"  I stared blankly.  "What's wrong?" She asked as if I'd insulted her.  "I have cancer, G." I felt annoyed having to remind her.

So I guess G's text was just reminder that I (and my cancer) am not on the forefront of everyone's mind. I get that.  I'm guilty of forgetting important happenings in the lives of others.  But it still made me mad.  I texted back a quick answer. "Nope. I don't have hair."  Yes, that was a mean way to remind her.  But I was worn out from taking on too much.  My giddy mood was zapped along with my energy. I started fretting over seeing the kids for the first time, since losing hair. What should I put on my head to soften my greeting? The wig is still a jolt... think. 

And then I remembered, everyone's coming to have fun, not to see me bald. We're going to be playing games and barbecuing and playing ukuleles and making tiki drinks and swimming! I can use my awesome, retro bathing cap!  Plus, I still have lashes and brows, I'm not that different.  I can't wait!